11/28/2010

The favorite science fiction author of MISA: Baba Vanga

Lately the MISA sites are full (there are more of course) of the oh, so guarantied-to-come-true prophecies of a now deceased Bulgarian medium named Baba Vaunlikeleyunlikeleynga. They are of course sure that she confirmed their crazy ideas about the future of mankind. And of course their special role in it all.

Now I have my own hypothesis about these prophecies. I hereby submit the hypothesis that she was actually a not too original sci-fi writer wannabe. For an alternate list of prophecies see here and here.
See the list of supposed things to come below:

2008 - Assassination attempts on four heads of states. Conflict in Indonesia. That becomes one of the causes for the start of WWIII.(*personal note: well this didn't happen)
2010 - The start of WWIII. The war will begin in November of 2010 and will end in October of 2014. Will start as a normal war, then will include usage of nuclear and chemical weapons.(*update on the 14th of January 2011 and there's still no world wide war. According to this we should be in full war mode for 2 moths now)
2011 - Due to the radioactive showers in Northern Hemisphere - no animals or plants will be left.(*personal note: so those of you who like to eat, enjoy those burgers and stuff till' then) Muslims will begin chemical war against Europeans who are still alive.
2014 - Most of the people in this world will have skin cancer and skin related diseases. (as a result of chemical wars).
2016 - Europe is almost empty
2018 - China becomes the new world power.
2023 - Earth’s orbit will change slightly
2025 - Europe is still barely populated
2028 - Development of a new energy source. (Probably controller thermonuclear reaction) Hunger slowly stops being a problem. Piloted spaceship to Venus deploys(see the movie First spaceship on Venus from the year 1960. Vanga died in 1996 so....)
2033 - Polar ice caps melt. World ocean levels rise.
2043 - World economy is prosperous. Muslims are running Europe.
2046 - Any organs can be mass produced. (see the movie The Island) Exchange of body organs becomes the favorite method of treatment.
2066 - During it’s attack on Rome (which is under control of the Muslims) U.S.A. uses a new method of weapons - has to do with climate change. Sharp freezing.
2076 - No class society (communism)
2084 - The rebirth of the nature.
2088 - New disease. - People are getting old in few seconds.(see the Stargate SG1 sci-fi series episode Brief Candle)
2097 - This disease is cured.
2100 - Man made Sun (see the move 2010 Space Odyssey II) is lighting up the dark side of the planet Earth.
2111 - People become robots. (see anything by I. Asimov)
2123 - Wars between small countries. Big countries don’t get evolved.
2125 - In Hungry the signals from Space are received(Contact, E.T., 80% of sci-fi really) (People will be reminded of Vanga again)
2130 - Colonies under water (advices from aliens)
2154 - Animals become half-humans.
2167 - New religion
2170 - Big drought.
2183 - Colony on Mars (see the movie Total recall) becomes nuclear nation and is asking for independence from the Earth. (same way as U.S. did from England)
2187 - Successfully two volcano eruptions are stopped.
2195 - Sea colonies are fully supplied with energy and food.
2196 - Full mixture between Asians and Europeans.
2201 - Thermonuclear reactions on the Sun slow down. Temperatures Drop.
2221 - In the search of Alien life, human beings engage with something very freighting. (*personal note think Alien)
2256 - Spaceship brings a freighting new disease into Earth.
2262 - Orbits of planets start to change progressively. Mars is under a threat of being hit by a comet.(that needs paranormal powers to predict LOL. Funny because "Mars is located closer to the asteroid belt, so it has an increased chance of being struck by materials from that source. Mars is also more likely to be struck by short-period comets, i.e., those that lie within the orbit of Jupiter.")
2271 - Physic properties are calculated over, since they changed. (*personal note: what does this even mean????)
2273 - Mix of yellow, white, and black race. New race. (too bad that nice old racist Vanga didn't know that we are all ONE race, there are not more human races, we are one race biologically speaking, so this is impossible)
2279 - Energy out of nothing (probably from vacuum or black holes)
2288 - Travel through time. New contacts with the aliens.(*need I point out how frequent a them this is in sci-fi movies and novels?)
2291 - Sun cools. Attempts to fire it up again are taken.(this has recently been adapted as the movie Sunshine)
2296 - Bright flashes on the Sun. Force of gravity changes. Old space stations and satellites begin to fall
2299 - In France, there is a partisan uprising against Islam.
2302 - New important new laws and mysteries about the universe are uncovered.
2304 - The mystery of the Moon is uncovered. (*personal note: wonder what that is?)
2341 - Something frightening is closing in with Earth from the space. (like int that shitty move Armageddon with Bruce Willis?)
2354 - Accident on one of the man made suns, will result in drought.
2371 - Mighty hunger.
2378 - New and fast growing race.
2480 - Two man made suns will collide. Earth is in the dark.
3005 - War on Mars. Trajectory (maybe orbit of the planets, trajectory makes no sense here since the planets are not falling, going or doing anything requiring this term. They are orbiting the Sun because of the Sun's gravitational field. But this may just be a bad translation.) of planets changes.
3010 - Comet will ram into the Moon. (Not the first time that's happened. "The other major geologic process that has affected the Moon's surface is impact cratering, with craters formed when asteroids and comets collide with the lunar surface. There are estimated to be roughly 300,000 craters wider than 1 km on the Moon's near side alone") Around Earth there is a belt of rocks and dust
3797 - By this time, everything living on Earth dies. But humans are able to put in the essentials for the beginning of a new life in a new star system.

Well, it's a bit repetitive, not too original, but it sure seems more like fiction then something plausible. On the other hand looking at the history of Earth so far this seems way too boring and so that probability that things will get this dull is very unlikely also. But from a semi-illiterate or illiterate woman born and raised in the first half of the last century's rural Bulgaria it's not too bad. 

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